so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
