I smell stomach acid.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
