I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
