I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
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