Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
