you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
