Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Holy shit dude........stairs
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
