Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize