Duck Duck Cougar?
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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