hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Randomize
