Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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