If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize