So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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