Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Randomize
