After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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