It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize
