you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize