Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
