...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
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