if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Randomize
