So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I've blown a few things in my day
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I am mentally ready for anal.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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