My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
