so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
