I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
