I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
