the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
