her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I think I just sharted jello shots
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