just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
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