You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Randomize
