the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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