She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
