i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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