yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
