The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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