I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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