YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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