The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
