And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize