How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
My Sexting was not on an AP level
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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