Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
