Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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