I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I looked at my own cervix.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
