Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
