there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
