I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
