there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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