It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Randomize
