She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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