There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
