I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Randomize
