I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
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