Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
