ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
